The Collegian (Brownwood, Tex.), Vol. 29, No. 28, Ed. 1, Friday, May 3, 1935 Page: 1 of 4

THE COLLEGIAN
DON'T FOGET
MOTHER
MOTHER'S DAY
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VOL. XXIX.
ROWNWOOD TEXAS FRIDAY MAY 3 1935
Price 5 Centt. No. 21
MEDHATIN'
IN THE BATHTUB
Soap Consumption
"Leach you are forever howling
about keeping clean and I bet you
don't know how much soap is used In
the United States every year" ribbed
one of my most worry-wartlsh
friends. But for once I knew. There
are on an average of 3000000000
pounds of soap and soap compounds
used annually in the United States.
Yes I agree that this Is an enor-
mous lot of soap 115 plus pounds
per individual but It is not enough
to keep us thoroughly clean. At least
not outwardly and inwardly. I have
about made up my mind that there is
really nothing wrong with the world;
it's the people of the world that make
it all confusing and Immoral. And
no soap has been Invented to wash
the mouths of the foul minded.
Foul Mouthed
Yesterday I had the misfortune to
be In the company of a cursing (at
least not a lady) girl. In all the at-
tempts I have made In efforts to be
the most profane I have never even
remotely reached the level this young
girl attained at a single outburst. She
was the foulest of the foul and from
what I would term from a very fine
family she has a sweet mother and
a fine father. But there Is no Hoap
strong enough to cleanse her mouth.
She Is off on the wrong foot.
Chain Letters
Colleges Express Opinions On
Students National War Strike
But the Beating of the Drums
Were Not Given Consideration
All the other college editors arc ex-1 ter a day of riots the gods only
jTi-srsiiiK uicir uiJiiiiuiiM in inu ihihbi- Knows.
blllty of students fighting in the next
war If any so we take the liberty
to do likewise: To all those strikers
who swear not to fight unless it Is to
defend their loved ones we say 'nerts.'
There is the one little thing that has
not been considered by any of them:
The beating of the drums. Music
emotionally played will do things for
one that no other source of expression
will. Yes when the drums start the
Sinop T have been nble to write my
name I have been on the receiving end
of chain letters but never until yes-
terday have I received one that was
a link In a smooth racketed ing
scheme. "Did you get a letter today
Grady?" Did I? Well I should say 1
did. I got exactly three of those 10c
chain letters and one of my ustcr-
bcen friends Informed me last night j
that he nad just mauea mo ihiuuri
that explains the uster-been.
I noticed In last evening's Brown-1
wood Bulletin where the postmaster
here did not think there would be a
mall rush here due to these lettets.
Well he has a sweet surprise In store (
for him within the next two weeks.
the department here will have dou-
bled. Should I get a response from every
letter than I have mailed out I
should be $4887.50 richer within the
next three weeks. Maybe It Isn't
right and maybe it is. Anyway if
is due to give the preachers some-
thing to preach about and the cross-
word and jig-saw fans a little rest.
Already you see students about thu
campus burning a trail to the mall
uoxes to collect their dally dimes to
attend the movies.
The "Torpedo" Egg
All of us have read about that far
mer's hen that laid the "torpedo" egg
recently? The farmer said that nacK
before the World War one of his hens
laid a similar egg and that he Imme-
diately predicted war In the very near
future. He was right we did have
war and what a war. This farmer
says that there will bo another war
because his hen has laid another
"torpedo."
What I am driving at Is that we
have laid a "torpedo" egg- no our
hen laid tho egg but we have It.
Should you want to see said "torpedo"
Just drop by the Collegian office. It's
there in all its horrible meaningness
and resemblance to a modern torpe-
do. (Egg laid just one week ago to-
day.) (Continued on page 4)
Bring A Dime to
Get Your Punch at
the Jr.-Sr. Prom
Though one may not be aware of
the fact it takes money to put on a
good prom. Many of the faculty
members and all of the students have
expressed their desires that Daniel
Baker have a good prom this year.
It has been suggested by one of the
sponsors that every Daniel Baker stu-
dent attending the prom bring ten
cents to cover his share of the re-
freshments. This will leave the
amount the college gives to decorate
the gym and furnish entertainment.
It is asking very little of one to give a
dime for a dollar's worth of fun.
Just bring the first dime you get
out of the exchange of these chain
letters to pay your admission by
the time the date rolls around for the
prom you will have received quite a
few.
It is suggested that all the classes
meet and collect the dimes in return
for a ticket to the punch bowl and
the promenade deck
i
Twenty-Five to Get
Degrees May 27th
Eleven girls and fourteen boys will
receive their B. A degrees at the
rVitnmnt-onmnnt P!vnrplsf nn Mnv 27.
1035 to be held at S. R. Coggin Mcm-4
orlal Chapel. The Baccalaureate Ser
vice will be held at the First Prcsby
tprlnn nhurch on SunJiiv. Mav 26.
The following are those who will I whole the protest will have no lasting
graduate:
"Peace propaganda is the only in-
herent good of these meetings" The
Rollins Sandspur Rollins College
(Winter Park Fla.) paper declared
also pointing out the fact that "any
scheme that will in some measure
thwart the politicians and munition
makers and tend to turn the minds
of the people towards a more favor-
able view of peace Is indeed worthy."
Because students are sadly lacking
war-throbs they will all be in the line in information on world affairs the
and marching fearfully but staunch
ly to the front these war babies of
lull.
When the music played the rats
of Hamlin followed the Pled Piper to
their death; when the drums beat the
war babies of 1914 will follow to their
death.
Now that the tumult' and the shout-
ing of the recent national student
strike against war has died down edi-
tors of college papers throughout the
country have reached the conclusion
that If the demonstration by nearly
150000 students accomplished nothing
else It did crystallize student opinion
and showed the world that the college
students of America are strongly op
posed to all forms of war.
While the strike was hailed by the
maloritv of college papers as a for
ward step several student editors ex-
pressed the viewpoint that on the
Sports in the News
Babe Dldrickson has gone and done
it again. Last Saturday in the art of
swinging a golf club she came out on
top in the annual Texas Woman's
Championship. Experts say that she
will win the National another year.
Babe Is the type that sctH u goal and
hits it. The world marvels with us
at the versatility of this wonder girl
who runs jumps plays tennis and
golf almost as well as men In fact
the men are not pulling their swings
when they are competing with the
Babe.
Allean Bcttis
Clara Othela Cook
Nellie Grace DeHay
Julia Wilkinson Hall
Anna Elizabeth Hoffman
Nannie Marie Plcrson
Blanche Alberta Perclfull
Mima Ann Williams
Ida Mary Stracencr
Billy Neal Dlllln
Melton E. Dobbs
Calvin Elgin Eaton
Burncy Fender Halt
Talmadge Head
Reaves Hickman
Charles Othel Hogue
James Edward Mclnnls
William Cole Nunnally
Robert M. Parks
Morris Rodgea
Joseph E. Snodgias.s
William Lyons White
H. Lamar Lee
Harvard Abolishes
Old Athletic System
CAMBRIDGE Mass Harvard Uni-
versity is about to embark upon a
radically diffcicnt athletic policy than
Is followed by any other college or
univcisity in the country.
Announced by Dr. James B. Con-
ant piesklent professional coaches in
most of the minor sports will be abol-
ished and the entire athletic program
will be placed on the same basis as
the other activities of the university
which are largely supported ty en-
dowments. All other sports will In the future
be operated Independently of football
which hitherto has made up the finan-
cial deficits sustained In the other
branches of Harvatd's athletic en-
deavors. m
A coed at Woodbuiy College (Los
Angeles) who has the use of only one
hand Is two weeks ahead of her class-
mates In a typewriter class.
effect. At the University of Buffalo
(N. Y.) the Buffalo Bee student pa-
per declared "What happened during
the local part of the national anti-war
movement makes one wonder if the
whole progiam Isnt just a blind for
the furtherance of communism."
The Minnesota Daily University of
Minnesota (Minneapolis) publication
points out the false interpretation of
the strike given by newspaers thru-
out the country summing up the situ-
ation as follows: "The aim of the
strike was to inform the nation that
college students wholeheartedly and
sincerely desired peace. What distort-
ed conception of that worthwhile mo-
tive remains in the national mind af-
Spectrum North Dakota State Col
lege paper declared that "with this
kind of knowledge at hand and an al
most negligible interest in contempor
ary international affairs it is futile
for anyone to attempt to mobilize stu-
dents in the Interest of peace."
The Corcoidlan student organ of
Concordia College (Moorhcad Minn.)
takes a dcidedly opposite stand and
pointing out that "prevalent among
the youth of our country is an earn-
est effott to establish and maintain
international goodwill. As the nation
of tomorrow If la to our interest to
carefully consider the possibilities for
assisting in freeing Ihc world from
the enemy of war."
Realizing that the strike itself may
not accomplish very much the Idaho
Bengal University of Idaho (Pocatel-
lo) paper believes "the cumulative
effect of many of these moves and
stretching over a period of years is
bound to be' great."
While objecting to calling the pro-
test a "strike" because of the un-
pleasant connotations given the New
Mexico Lobo University of New Mex-
ico (Albuquerque) publication feels
that the movement has value because
"It has been Important In the crystal-
lization of student thought and a de-
cided impetus t8tudent initiative."
The Daily Dartmouth Dartmouth
College (Hanover N. H.) student pa-
per supported the strike because "In
time of peace we must build an anti-
war sentiment to the point where it
will be able to fight cooperaltvcly
against the emotional hysteria of wartime."
Dr. J. F. Strawlnskl of Philadelphia
has been timing tennis balls on the
serve and finds that Lester Stoefen
hits the hardest ... the 6 foot 4 inch
Californlan plunks the velvet pill 103
feet per second and thnt measures a
speed of 131 miles per hour no won-
der they XIP-SWEE by. Ellsworth
Vines serves at the speed of 130.2 m.
n. m.: BUI Tilden still clops them
128.4 m. p. h. George Lott is the sissy
of the pro's . . . the best in his arm
Is 108 m. p. h.
St. Edwards downed Sul Ross in a
spring-training football clash the oth-
er day by one point the score: 19-20.
Miss Virginia K.
Skinner Married
to Drennon Monk
Announcement has been made here
and In Austin of the marriage of Miss
Virginia Kerr Skinner of Brownwood
and Mr. Drennon Monk of Austin
which took place on January 5 1935.
Mrs. Monk a student in the Grad-
uate School at the University of Tex-
as is the only daughter of Mr. and
Mrs. G. C. Skinner of this city. She
was reared and educated in Brown-
wood schools and is a graduate of
Daniel Baker College. She is a prom-
inent member of the younger social
sets of this city and is also well
known in literary and musical groups
here.
Mr. Monk is a former student of
the engineering department of the
University of Texas and is engaged
in that work in Austin where he and
his bride ar"c making their home.
Brownwood Bulletin.
The Billie Tracksters will be in
Georgetown Friday and Saturday. 10-
11 to do their share in the annual
Texas Conference Track and Field
Meet.
Max Baer went Into training for his
coming bout with James J. Braddock
Monday. He Is going to do a lltltc
gardening and wood-chopping on the
estate of Hal Simms out in Ausbiuy
Park N. J. Max is only tsix pou:vJH
over fighting weight now and will
not have the trouble he encountered
in preparation for Camera he enter-
ed that fight in no condition. P. S.
He'll win in a walk!
WE GIVE8 UP!
A letter from Mrs. Clara Bow-
er of Tenaha Texas asking for
help in figuring out her family
relationships leaves ut in a quan-
dry and her plea for help unan-
swered. If you can dope out the answer
ws feel that she will thank you
plenty and we would bestow up-
on you the honor "Super Genius
Plus."
Here is her problem:
"My father's brother married
my husband's sister. They had
10 children.
"My husband had seven chil-
dren when I married him. We
have five.
"My father's brother's oldest
son married my husband's second
daughter. They had five children.
"Now four of these children are
married and have children. Three
of my children also have children.
"What relation are these chil-
dren? "We cannot figure out how we
are related?"
Publisher's Auxiliary.
Henry VIII Wasa
Fascinating Man
A student at the University of Illi
nois (Champaign) whote an essay for
Emllie Dionne a quintuplet mem-
ber sprouted a molar yesterday and
so joined the Annette and Marie class.
Yvonne Is still in the lead with n
coupla lowers. They are all on the
road to recovery after having severe
head colds.
m
Energy Level is Cause for
Growth of Paternalism
CINCINNATI Ohio. Whether you
believe It' or not the acceptance of
radical social and economic innova-
tions in the United States today will
be tolerated only so long as the pres-
ent cycle of generally mild unstimu-
laitng weather continues.
At Ion at thnt In tho thoorv of Dr.
class on Hackett's "Henry The 8th." i Clarcrtce A. Mills professor of experi-
Followlng is an actual excerpt from mentul medicine in the University of
t: I Cincinnati who has recently publish-
"Henry the Eighth was a very fas- i ed a vomme on "Living with the
cinaiing man using a douk wuiuu i weather "
When Freedom Is
Forbidden Blow
Out the Lights
CHICAGO. "Freedom of inquiry
freedom of discussion and freedom ot
teaching without these a university
cannot cxilst." Robert M. Hutchlns
president of the University of Chica-
go declared recently in a speech given
over a nultonal radio hook-up.
( Answevliw llij.quPBtion "What in a
University V" 1'it-sident' Hutchlns stat-
ed that "A university Is a community
of scholars. It is not u kindergarten;
it is not a club; it is not a reform
school; it is not a political party; it is
not' an agency of propaganda."
Without freedom a university be-
comes a political party or an agency
of propaganda and ceases to be a uni-
versity President Hutchlns said.
Continuing he declared that "the
university exists only to find and to
communicate the truth. If it cannot
do that it Is no longer a university."
In concluding the speaker said
"The Aineiican people must decide
whether they will longer tolerate the
seatch for truth. If they will the uni-
vcisitles will endure and give light
and leading to the nation. If they will
not then as a great political scientist
has put it we can blow out the light
and fight it out in the dark; for when
the voice of reason is silenced the
rattle of machine guns begins."
Large Crowd Hears
Band Concert Sun.
The blast that blows the loudest la
soon overblown. T. G. Smollett.
Francis Hackett wrote. He ended
feudalism by killing those of the op-
posite feud and thus became a great'
dictator. Henry married eight wives
and even though a Spanish princess
told him she had only one neck he
sent for her. Catherine bored Henry
and would have me too. So he mar-
ried and disposed of others by losing
his head. Henry's chief advisor was
Wolsey who was a butcher's son but
who later turned Pope. Wolsey could
not speak Spanish though and so his
head was cut off. Without a doubt'
Henry was the greatest magnate of
all times."
m i
The Dally Illlnl University of Illi-
nois (Champaign) student paper sug-
gests the reason the Sing Sing prison
football team is trying to get a game
with the Army team Is to prove that
the pen is mightier than the sword.
Tho growth of paternalism In Amer-
ican government is allowed to pro-
ceed according to Dr. Mills because
the mild wqather is responsible for
the population's low energy level.
This energy change" he affirms
Last Sunday the citizens of Brown-
wood were given a treat when the
Daniel Baker band under the capable
ditection of director Jimmtc King
rendered one of the best concerts of
the year fiom the campus in front of
"is only temporary and few of these the Coggin Memorial Chapel. The
radical social or economic innovations program was thoroughly enjoyed by
will be tolerated when cold stormy
years return and excess energy again
pushes men to demand greater free-
dom of action."
'Suicides" he says "which give us
the large attending audience.
The afternoon though a bit windy
did not thwart the energetic drum
twiddlers and wind blowers. And in
spite of the fact that sheet' music was
tho best index of mental exhaustion blown in every direction they played
are highest where storm changes are . marvelously well.
greatest. Waves of suicides Bhow a
distinct tendency to occur at times or
calling of low barometric pressure
such as come just before storm
changes."
m i
Rarely promise; Sut If Lawful con-
stantly perform. Wm. Penn.
The oliitinot duct rendered by
Ruth Johnston and Donald Coursey
was played from the bottom of their
hearts. It only goes to show what a
great part love plays in making one
rhythmic.
It is hoped that the band will ap-
pear again soon.
PRESENTING A PREVIEW OF A REVIEW OF "THE OMNIBUS OF BONERS"
IN THREE FARTS PART XXVI
In previewing this review of "The Omnibus of Boners" your irrespondent
wUhes to muke this one think CLEAR; This book is a truth in every word
being a group of answers that famous college professors have conceived from
thousands of examinations they have taken. But strangely none of the
men would condescend to claiming any part of the famous work consequently
It comes to our book stands in three volume without an author.
They tried to compile the entlro works under one cover but tho content
laughing and wiggling at the cracka above and below It kept the blnderi
splitting. It was finally decided to break It into three parts. The books
went- to press in 1927 but the linotype machines laughed themselves alck thus
accounting for their long delayed appearance on the bookshelves.
It has been rumored that there is a little bit of humor In places. One
will be able to draw a general conception from the following and to deter-
mine whether it will be worth tola time to read the remaining volatile!.
Germinate: To germinate Is to become a naturalized German.
Epistle: An epistle is tho wife of an apostle.
Deacon: A deacon Is the lowest kind of a Christian.
A Mayor is a he horse.
The letters M. D. signify "Mentally Deficient."
A refugee keeps order at a football game.
S. O. S. Is a musical term meaning same only softer.
A skeleton Is a man with his Inside out and his outside off.
LITERATURE AND ART
George Eliot left a wife and children to mourn his genii.
Casslus was a vile selfish man who was always doing his best to make
his own ends meet.
DEFINITIONS
Acrimony: Sometimes called holy is another name for marriage
Celibacy: The crime a priest commits when fee marries
An epitaph is a short sarcastic poem.
Poetry is u thing you make prose of.
H. G. Wells' history is a vertablc millstone on the road to learning.
Three tragedies by Shakespeare: Macbeth King Lear and Twelve Nights
in a Bar Room.
Milton wrote Paradise Lost and was a Roman Catholic who graduated
at Oxford. He also had a good education.
An interval in music is the distance from one piano to the next.
ISLE RELIGIONS MYTH
In Christianity a man can have only one wife. This Is called Monotony.
Question: Who waB sorry when the Prodigal Son returned? Answer:
The fatted calf.
Cornelius was the first Gentile Virgin.
The Tower of Babel was the palace where Solomon kept his wives.
(Continued on Page Four)
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