The Dallas Journal, Volume 53, 2007 Page: 110
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Remembering Mammaw
two women become closer than anyone could
have imagined. Although Flo's sons also kept
close contact by phone and often visited,
Virginia lived only a few miles away. Thus, Flo
frequently called upon Virginia to take her
shopping and running errands. Flo, in turn,
helped Virginia by doing laundry and household
chores.
By 1975, Virginia was dealing with growing
financial and medical burdens. Between 1969
and 1975, Virginia's ex-husband, Harry, died
leaving a mentally retarded son, Robbie, who
would always be partially dependent. Virginia
and her lesbian partner ended their eight-year
relationship. Complications from diabetes
affected Virginia's ability to work as in the
restaurant industry. She needed to change
careers. The sum of all these issues made it
impossible for Virginia to support herself and
son Robbie. So, Flo took them into her home.
This practice of taking in family was nothing
new for Flo. For years, her brother, Mack, came
periodically for extended stays while under
treatment at Veterans Medical Center on
Lancaster Ave (now Martin Luther King Blvd).
By 1977, Virginia and Robbie were living at
Whitehall Lane. It was intended to be a
temporary arrangement, and in a sense, it was.
Virginia made several attempts over the ensuing
years to regain her independence and to move
into her own place. Yet circumstances often
forced her to return to her mother's house and
care.
Virginia and Robbie were living with Flo about
a year when Virginia's youngest son Andrew
approached both women. His wife had
abandoned him with two babies, Anessa, age
three, and Duane. age eight or nine months.
Andrew was trying to develop his own business
without success. The children had no place to
stay or anyone to care for them. The only
alternative, as the two women saw it, was to
place the children in foster care. Despite the fact
that neither woman was in good health, neither
woman could allow the children to go to fosterhomes. They, with Robbie's support, agreed to
take Anessa and Duane into Mammaw's home.
Soon after the children were settled, Mammaw
decided that it was time to wean little Duane
from his baby bottle. I had long known that
Mammaw had some folk ways about her.
Notions, I supposed, that she learned from her
parents. She held a few superstitions, such as "it
is bad luck to give someone a gift that is sharp."
I gave her a set of steak knives for Christmas
one year and she insisted that she pay me a
penny for them. Otherwise, the gift was bad
luck for the giver and the recipient. She also
once used a penny to "rub" a wart from my
finger. The wart did not immediately disappear,
but-yes-it did disappear within a few weeks.
So, when it came time to separate Duane from
his baby bottle, Mammaw knew that there was a
best time to start weaning an infant. She claimed
that when the moon was in various phases, it
affected different parts of the body. When it
reached the phase where the knees or feet were
most prominent, that was the day to begin
weaning. She required a copy of the Farmer's
Almanac. The almanac was not easy to find in
metropolitan Dallas in 1978. Yet, find one, she
did. So, with lunar chart in hand, Mammaw
weaned Duane by the cycle of the moon. I never
learned if the task was as quick and easy as she
said it would be. For Mammaw, I suppose that it
was.
It was also during this period that Mammaw's
great grandchildren began calling her "Little
Mammaw." No doubt the adjective rankled her,
but it was hard to distinguish who was being
addressed in conversation. Virginia was also
known as "Mammaw" to her grandchildren. So,
Virginia, at 5'3", became "Big Mammaw." Flo,
much to her chagrin, became "Little
Mammaw."'9
19 At a family gathering, Duane, then age 11, stood
beside his great-grandmother. He turned to face her short
frame and gleefully announced, "Look, Little Mammaw!
I'm as big as you are!" Hearing that, I burst out laughing
because I recalled that, when I was his age, I had done the110 Dallas Journal 2007
110
Dallas Journal 2007
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Dallas Genealogical Society. The Dallas Journal, Volume 53, 2007, periodical, October 2007; Dallas, Texas. (https://texashistory.unt.edu/ark:/67531/metapth186866/m1/114/: accessed April 25, 2024), University of North Texas Libraries, The Portal to Texas History, https://texashistory.unt.edu; crediting Dallas Genealogical Society.