Texian Stomping Grounds Page: 36
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TEXIAN STOMPING GROUNDS
Williams, had never been beyond the confines of Texas, Arkansas
and Louisiana; but he had an enquiring mind and a roving
"While in Bom-bay I made the acquaintance of a noted yogi,
and this acquaintance ripened into friendship. This yogi possessed
a preparation which could eradicate pain of any kind, ab-so-lute-ly
any kind, and I implored my Hindu friend to impart to me the
secret formula of his mar-ve-lus remedy, but to no avail. Ladies
and gentlemen, for years he was adamant against my entreaties;
but, at last, one evening while in a deep trance he revealed to me
the magical formula, and quickly I wrote it down for your benefit
and for suffering humanity everywhere."
(At this point, our sophisticated town dude just returned from
the Saint Louis World's Fair, in order to show superior indiffer-
ence for such a plebeian gathering, with one foot dangling outside
displaying a sharp-toed patent leather shoe, whizzed by in his
new rubber-tired, under-cut buggy, wheeling dust on the speaker
and his audience. Again Keeno drew out his flashy handker-
chief as a means of ignoring the interruption.)
"From the formula I learned that the myterious healing qual-
ity of the yogi's powerful preparation was found in the juice of
certain rare herbs that grew on the banks of the sacred Ganges."
(John, the comedian, now relaxed after his strenuous labor
of drawing the crowd, first blew his nose furiously, and then
deliberately cut and cleaned his finger nails with a large pearl-
"I was determined that the boon I had discovered should be
made available to the people of my own country; so, after great
expense and difficulty, I obtained a large supply of the con-cen-
trated essence of Ganges herbs, which I brought to America."
(Here the jack intervened with another long crescendo and
mournful diminuendo while Keeno drank water and rubbed his
perspiring hands with the handkerchief.)
"In co-lab-o-ra-shun with chemists, I have evolved a medicine
even more potent than the old remedy that I found in India,
and the name of it is Yogi Oil." (Here he dramatically held aloft
a bottle of the remarkable potion labelled with a picture of his
turbaned friend.) "This medicine sells for only two dollars per
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Dobie, J. Frank (James Frank), 1888-1964. Texian Stomping Grounds, book, 1941; Dallas, Texas. (texashistory.unt.edu/ark:/67531/metadc67663/m1/44/: accessed April 23, 2018), University of North Texas Libraries, The Portal to Texas History, texashistory.unt.edu; crediting UNT Press.