The J-TAC (Stephenville, Tex.), Vol. 30, No. 26, Ed. 1 Saturday, April 1, 1950 Page: 1 of 4
This newspaper is part of the collection entitled: Texas Digital Newspaper Program and was provided to The Portal to Texas History by the Tarleton State University.
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V
SPRING HOLIDAYS
TO BEGIN
YESTERDAY
'M
API
C K L
,K.
WHAT ARE
YOU LOOKING
HERE FOR?
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*xxx "10 A
M S. DEPARTMENT MAKES DRASTIC REDUCTIONS
Eaststream Stopped While
Running: Bobbles Story
S Ctrl 24—EASTSTREAM STOP
Miss Maria Trust Eaststream,
.alias Miss Mary Hope Westbrook,
was seized in her 19,47 Souped-UP
Speedster after giving Tarleton
Kiddiekar Patrolman Sleuthfoot
McCpy an expedition . chase up
Tarleton Boulevard Maria Trust,
who has been ser.ving' as superin-
tendent of finances for the Stadium
Fund, recently absconded with mil-
lions of dollars entrusted to her
care, . *
Malicious Mary, as she is com-
monly known by the TSC students,
was first seen at the time of the
chaste speeding .around corners,
through . alleys and up and down
the main thoroughfares on the Tar-
leton campus. Sleuthfoot McCoy
gave chase and continued to give
chase for 1,577 blocks at a speed
of 125! miles per hour.
Pa+rolman McCoy, former mem-
ber of the Scotland: Yard police
force, captured the speed crazed
ifesperado after she had injured
her foot by pushing it through the
floor board and into the engine in
a derperato attempt, to gain dis-
tance from the pursuing officer.
. By the quick, thinking and prompt
action of Tarleton's famous G-
(Gee we wishweeouldcatch'eni) men,
$7.35 of the millions that East-
stream pilfered was recovered. The
G-men believe that the remainder
was «pent in providing candy, soda
watev, flowers, find other oddities
for' Eaststream.-
The alias Miss Westbrook is be-
ing held in the Tarleton ultra-
modern jail, which is now located
oh the fourth floor of the recently
constructed Home Economic build-
ing. The date of her hearing is set
for April 31 and will be held in
the Tarleton Court House, which
was formerly known as the Night
Watchmens Shack.
Fowls Struck;
No More Aigs
NO DICE!
Because of enormous accumu-
lated profits of the College Din-
ing Hall and the College Store,
dormitory students will get free
room and board for the remain-
der of the semester and notes on
all loans to Tarleton students
will Ipe torn up, it has been an-
nounced by Grrrr Fanning.
The announcement ■ was made
' oyer-the.dead Framkie
Mooseberger arid' Ritbe jViou.'
Datfis, but it reached its culmina-
tion of power only recently,' under
. I,he able guidance of Howell.
And,now it is broken up.
.*■ Orders sent to his hoodlum lead-
ers, which includes Rube Friou,
John E. . Tompkins, Helen' Wilferd,
G. R. Fanning-, Dean Paul Cunyus
and Cecil Ballou,* have been un-
covered in the office of the presi-
, dent. The- carbon copies had been
typed and filed by Daphne Hoqver,
Cunyus, it was revealed, was
second in command of the in-
famous ring and sjaw, that the.
orders of his boss was carried out.
The business office, under the di-
lectionof Fanning; has long been
used to record the profits of,,the
drugs and liqour and estimate the
future' prices they must be sold at,
Tompkins has been using his
office to record the names and add-
resses of the customers as well as
those of prospective customers. A
ruse that Tompkins had been using
for a long time was uncovered. He
had been sending pink slips to
summon the buyers, all students, to
his office where he dunned them
for the money owed to the ring,
Rubeun Frious confessed that he
had b^en. using' the post office as
a means of importing the hootch
and knock-out drops. He and his
employees had spiked the cokes in
the rec hall, running the price on
them up to fifty cents each. He had
also sold the liquor as hair ^onic,
shampoo, and toilet water. More
than that, he had sold marijuana
and opium in empty boxes of soap,
typewriter ribjbons, ink bottles,
and many other small articles.
■The two people who did most of
the dirty work for the ring were
Helen Willard and Cecil Ballou.
. Both had stores of the goods in
their rooms which they peddled sat
night ifi the dorms. ,
The gang was turned in by the
firm known -as Peacock, Hoising-
ton, and Thomas, who had recently
been foiled in their attempt to set
up a competing ring.
Over 900 hens at the college
poultry farm went, on strike yes-
terday afternoon, saying that no
more eggs will be laid until the
union's four demands1 are met, ac-
cording to W. D. Graves, head
chickcn-plucker.
The only condition's under which
the striking cacklers will return
to the nests, as set forth by Local
1, Federated Egg' Producers Union,
are 'vorking hours per day short-
ened to 33; new wage rates based
on hours worked instead of produc-
tion, with the new wage set at
three pounds of enriched laying
chow per hour and free oysters-on-
-half-shell and extra large grass-
hoppers as management sponsored
benefits; employment sponsored
accident insurance' and old-age pen-
sions; and three t,unes taken off the
college-owned, non-profit juke box
in "the chickens' rec hall.
The offending tunes, according
to the union president, are "To-
morrow Is Forever" (opposed to
the standing union demand for
shorter working hours), "There's
Nobody Here But . Us Chickens"
(gives the hens;£,inferiority .com-,
plexes),'and "The Cry of-the Wild
Goose" (because restlessness on
the assembly lines, and a strongly
felt desire to; "go where the wild
goose goes and do what the wild
goose does wlqen- he gets there",
as one unhappy would-be canvas-
back expressed. ..it).
Already the pipch of the strike
is being felt. The dining hall has
announced that it will be force to
switch to Don River caviar for its
omelets if the! strike is continued
more than 63 years. Even this
morning, no eggs were available
for making bread, so Tarletonites
were force temporarily to discon-
tinue their time-hallowed custom
of throwing buns at friends across
the hreakfast tables,
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Prominent chicken-man relations
experts told reporters that a long
fight is. ahead, grimly warning' Tar-
letonites that there may even be
^ionaxs siAioj- 98 [< z
-- SSO.tQ SifBU .xo^.todojf
•Id 98 I°0 8
JiUtqOBaX dfl
ai0 ox Aa[d.iBx
Infamous Howell Ring Broken —
Justice has triumphed again. A
notorous bootlegging and narcotic
ring headed by President E. Jody
Howell and involving most of the
top men in the Tarleton adminis-
tration was broken, up yesterday
by the ever-vigilant Stephenvile
police force. The intricate details
of the infamous ring's method of
distributing the goods have not all
been uncovered as yet, because of
the fact that it involves so many
people.
According to a confession of
Howell's, brought out by extensive
third-degree questioning, the gang
is a continuation of the one op-
erated by John Tarleton, who
founded' this institutin on its prof-
its. The power of the ring increas-
ed under the long reign of Dean
no eggs available for coloring at
Easter this ye& This announce-
ment is expect^Jgto rouse the stu-
dent Dody to d^fand a, settlement
of the disastro4||strike before last
Wednesday.
WOLF TO GIVE
INFO ON LIRV
Tactics and maneuvers of cam-
pusology will be the military sci-
ence mouse taught to 202, cadets
for the remainder of the semester,
■Private Ganer announced. The in-
structor for this'class will be Re-
cruit Carysle Pedro Wolf.
Tht1 regular weekly drill will be
dismissed, as this class wiU be
taught three times each week, plus
a lab to be held each Thursday
afternodn in place of the usual
parade. ■
By arrangements made with Red
Willurd, the girls from Gouph Hall
will be employed as lab assistants.
Red seemed to think that the girls
would get their money's worth, and
that the boys would enjoy the class
more with the girls as assistants.
Recruit Wolf states that it is
time Campusology was taught as
a military course here. According
to Wolf, almost all soldiers can
shoot and salute, but few know
the essentials of campusology.
More To
Sweet Lil
An address1 by Dean Hilary
More will be the main attraction in
the program for eight million FHA
girls' who will visit Tarleton
campus today. Hilary has not yet
definitely chosen his subject, but
the address will concern one of two
things:
•'I will either speak on' the value
•I
■mm
* ,SV
of Elucidean, geometry in modern
cookery' or 'How to achieve intel-
lectual satisfaction from knitting
pot holders,' " the keen, intellectual
Hilary announced.
Many other events are planned
for the girls entertainment. After
the address by Hilary the girls
will be treated with a lectur? and
demonstration by Survey Doremus
on fridge dynamiting. "We feel
this will he of great value to those
girls who are contemplating demo-
lition work as: a career," Doremus
r *
said. Thi^ work includes such fields
as sabatquge, home wrecking, >etc.
since there is no bridge handy
around Tarleton the deomnstration
will probably be. conducted in the .
Recc Ha}, placing the dynamite at .laqim q
M;S. Department Makes Drastic
Cadet Colonel Prosper Walker
and Cadet Lieutenant Colonels Vic-
tor Moore and Gordon Smith were
busted to the rank of cadet yard-
bird, in 'a vast military change
announced yesterday,
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The new lieutenant cojonels are
Edward Jenkins and Hei-bie Hark-
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rider. Both of these co lets have
th eessential talents tc become ex-
cellent batallion commanders.
When questionyd by this re-
porter, General Rothwell gave the
following reasons for these re-
ductions. He stated that Prosper
Walker did ".n >t spend enough time
with his military duties. Instead,
Walker divided his time between
playing pool and courting the girls
at the girls dorm'.
Genera! Rothwell explained that
Moore was reduced because I13 has
been an officer in the core'for the
past five years. Moore also never
wears anything §lse except the
prescribed iiniform. According' to a'
reliable sour -e, he sleeps with his
diamonds pinned on his shoulder.
Smith was reduced because his
voice is so difficult to understand
each Thursday afternoon. Smith
explained that tlu reason for his
voice sounding thi; way was the
bad cold that he nas had since
school started. When ksked why he
kept a cold all of the time, Smith
bushed and said that it was be-
cause he came home late each night
frome seeing Donna,.
s
4
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stragetic places in the rafters just
as if they were dynamiting a real
bridge instead, "We intend to make
the Rec Hall a real Wreck Hall,"
Doremus, Said( ,
with the conclusion of the dem-
onstration the gurls will; be whisk-
ed off to the last attraction, an ex-
ctitin afternoon and evening read-
ing in the library. Five' thousand
extra copies of dictionaries have
been secured for this purpose. "The
library ,,>vill remain open until
mi,duight:'tp allow the girls; to stay
fcnd' read ' the : 'dictionaries''' 'Dean
.Hillary' said.' ' ' ,
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The J-TAC (Stephenville, Tex.), Vol. 30, No. 26, Ed. 1 Saturday, April 1, 1950, newspaper, April 1, 1950; (https://texashistory.unt.edu/ark:/67531/metapth141095/m1/1/: accessed March 29, 2024), University of North Texas Libraries, The Portal to Texas History, https://texashistory.unt.edu; crediting Tarleton State University.