The Thresher (Houston, Tex.), Vol. 5, No. 11, Ed. 1 Thursday, January 15, 1920 Page: 4 of 4
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THE THRESHER, JANUARY 15, 1M0
"AH my hopes," the maiden sighed,
To get married soon, had died;
Then Leap Year came along
And my heart sang a song.
Sang a song of hope and cheer,
Praising this giad Leap Year,
Tiii I'd tried and aii in vain
To get someone to change my name.
The first t tried was Leap Year's night.
Ashing the first man who came in sight.
Hut what a iot of grief his refusal car-
When he said that he was married.
The next i asked to be tnv mate
Said that I was far too iate;
The niisht before at 12:01
His ntanty heart had been won.
"t started off down the street,
Aching every one I'd meet;
Asking every Tom and Harry
if they thought they'd tike to marry.
"Hut no one would - they aii said
Tbey were too old or aiready wed,
Or eise too young or just engaged,
Tiit tny heart did rage.
Stii) i \satk the streets ai) day
\\ ith my weaith aii on dispiay;
And now whenever men see me
They turn ami tun they fiee, they
i'iee! —t). M.
<)\!,Y A n)H A\[.
Last night as i iay steeping
i'pon tny feather bed
Some angets came a-ftylng
Around my tittle head.
There was one sweet fail angei
W'irh a tender smite and kind.
And visions of Oid i'ootbaii days
And Little Mac came to mind.
And then a grin started spreading
Tilt it grew from ear to ear.
Ant) I wondered how Hank Jarvis
(!ot to that Heavenly sphere.
Suddenly, across the cover,
So mighty quick and fast,
i saw a taii guy sprinting,
'Twas Dyer going past.
An angei with a yeiiow head
And Freshman face of red '
Resembled McGee muchiy
As he huidted o'er the bed.
T saw some one a punting,
Like he knew what he was about;
The bands of white on his trousers
't'oid me that Georgie I'oweli was out.
Then white teeth flashed beside me,
in a calm and serene grin,
And i wondered if our Duggan
Came to tackte vice and sin.
There was Dover, our hero Josh,
Cood at forward passes
And preacher, fine at foottbai!
And a vamper of the iassies.
There was Cerlach. swift and speedy,
And at right end was oid Hair
And Jim Potts, sure at kicking,
And our Alexander there.
There was Drummond, short and
Knocking angels ail about,
And good oid Xash and Heath and
And many more, no doubt.
Why alt these hays are angeis
i reaily can not see,
For i lived as good as they did,
So there might be some chance
And then! The whoie crowd silenced
And stood in proud saiute,
For to! From the opening Heavens
Came Brick, of Rice Institute.
Oh. Brick! You good oid captain,
A friend and a fighter, too.
You ied your men to victory,
You upheid the gray and blue.
And for deeds of footbaii vaior
So conciuded my footbaii dream—,
You're aii welcomed into Paradise
And are made a Heavenly team.
By a Solemn One.
THE ADVENTURES OF DEMOB-
Freshman McGee—"Gee, just think!
I made my bed before coming to break-
Being an Account of Hi* Peregrination*
and the Vicissitudes of His Journey
to Austin and Return Therefrom.
We left Houston at two o'clock Fri-
day afternoon, Iittie reckoning that our
return to the fair city would be delayed
untH four days later. Just beyond Camp
Logan we were picked up in a chari-
tably inclined flivver and given a ride
all the way to Hempstead. We were
just congratulating ourselves on our
iuck when a colored gentleman with the
dope at his finger tips informed us that
our only chance to get out on time for
the game in Austin was to catch the
Mind of No. 45, at one o'clock the next
We occupied the interim by lying on
a box car and watching the village yok-
els remove each others gates, ensconce
each others furniture in the trees, and
perform aii the other time-honored
Hallowe'en ceremonies. About twelve
o'clock we crawled down, aitnost into
the arms of a trainman, who advised
us to go down and sit in the depot be-
fore we got putted. We accepted his
advice, and found there three of our
schoolmates, who had come over on a
freight. When No. 4 5 got in, we sepa-
rated to catch the train. My buddy and
I caught the front blind, between the
tender and the baggage car. We were
totalty ignorant of the road, so we were
afraid to get out at stations, lest we
should get down on the wrong side of
the track and attract the unwelcome at-
tention of some observant trainman.
Hrenham we reached successfully.
There the train thoughtfully stopped
where a 10,000 candle-power arc light
shone down between the tender and the
baggage car. The conductor waddled
up to read his orders.
"What the, oh, dear me, are you pre-
cious iittie rascals doing there?" (Orig-
inal version censored.)
' G&ing to Austin, sir," we said.
"Well, get you—sweet little selves—
off a there or til have you pulled at the
We took his advice aiso. From Bren-
ham we waiked seven miies to Miti
Creek and slept the remainder of the
night in the rain, entirely too close to
Nature, on the steps of a hospitable
cotton gin. That is to say, we tried to
sleep, but by daybreak Mill Creek had
taken its place, in our opinion, along-
side that other famous creek, which is
apparent tv restricted to one-way traffic.
' Pawn found us on the road again,
and we reached the iittie town of Bur-
ton about nine o'clock. We decided to
take the passenger from there on. We
kgured the fare, at three cents a mile,
at $3.10 each, and squandered the rest
of our substance on the riotous viands
of ham and eggs. Then we returned to
the station and the pleasant realization
that we had forgotten about the war
tax. Sherman put it mildly. Nothing to
do but walk it off. We started down the
track, my buddy using aii the resources
of his rich pipe-line vocabulary in curs-
ing the Kaiser. Our time for the four
and a half miles was one hour and ten
minutes, reaching the village of Car-
mine with our tongues hanging out,
and otherwise dragging, an hour and
forty minutes ahead of our train. We
bought our tickets and had four cents
We reached Austin in time to see the
last half of the game. Let us once
more censor our opinions, but the last
half was the best at that. It waS a hard
blow to us who had spent such a deal
of tabor getting there to see it.
When we came to start home, we had
a hot argument as to which was the
right direction. My buddy won the dis-
pute. and we walked about two miles
before we remembered that we hadn't
passed any Colorado River on the trip
up. We executed to the rear, march,
retraced our steps to Austin, and slept
in a haystack five miles the other way
out. Next day we chose the H. & T. C.
as our vehicle, and as we lay beside the
track and waited in vain for our train
to come along, we heard * taUd proces-
sion of Katy freight* rumbling by
where we were not. Many of them were
Houston bound, but we, in our Igno-
rance, thought Dallas was their only
Sunday night we spent in another
haystack. We concocted a beautiful
scheme to bore into the middle of the
stack and sleep there cosily, protected
from the weather and intrusions. But
we soon learned that the undertaking
was about as feasible and enjoyable as
playing hop-scotch barefooted on a pile
of broken beer bottles. We compro-
mised for warmth and privacy by cov-
ering up with loose hay, and sleeping
the best we could.
Monday morning a neat little twelve-
car freight came by, and we hopped it.
Five miies down the line the brakeman
discovered us, and as he seemed to be
unanimously in agreement with the
other two who had chased us off before,
we deemed it advisable to accept his
advice too. We walked the reBt of the
day, reaching Elgin just before dark.
There we found that the Katy's main
line to Houston ran through Elgin. We
were quite fed up on the H. & T. C., so
we waited a while and caught a Katy
freight. Then our troubles were over.
I rode the train to Eureka, and from
there caught a ride in a car to Houston.
My buddy rode straight through to
Houston, in the sumptuous ease of a
car of cotton seed. The only brakeman
who bothered him listened to his taie
of woe and advised him to get back to
school and stay there.
He has, and he says he wiil.
THE WOHM HAS Tt HXHI).
Cheer up. maiden fair, take heart.
Vamping can be made an art.
Cease your sighing, dry that tear,
Don't you know this is Leap Year?
Three long years without a date,
Not a beau nor a soul mate;
Not a cloister course, nor a chance
To attend one big Rice dance.
All these things are out of date,
They are things you can relate;
But jieed not endure again
As long as there are any men.
There's a reason why, you know,
You can pick out any beau
And to every dance till the end of
You may go—for you know the rule.
That Leap Year is when the maidens
Get married to a man.
Co-eds are proposing everywhere,
So Rice-eds better have a care.
Or you'll be caught next in the net
Co-eds all for you have set;
You've given up your liberty one whole
And some forever, I do fear.
A Thing or Two Mr. Drafter ( an t
How do yon extract pork from pig-
What is the chemical formula for
changing Lot's wife into salt?
X. Y.—"We bet that quite a few men
would like to know that formula."
—wet!, sir, Pete comes in.
You know Pete. We!!, Pete says,
"\\ hat's this here pecan looking
thing, George?" "Oh," I says,
"that—why that's one new Mex.
prcalirics we mabe every day
fresh." Pete says, just like that,
"Cee, they took good. I wish I
had some 'jack' with me." And
Mr. Rohinson says, "I got
some." And he had some and,
gee, you ought to see the smites
ait over their faces. Now you
ask him about that stuff at the
R. A. BOND. Pres. and Treats.
Phone Preston t40')
B. J. HBtMAN. Vice-Ptcs.
Phone Preston 140a
E. R. MATHEWS, Secy.
Phone Preston S9b
C. L. & THEO. BERING, Jr.
WHOLESALE anJ RETAIL
/Var&?are, $porMn# Coo&, Croc&ery onJ C/aMtoare
Boat ant/ /4 u?o .Supples
609-6)) MAIN STREET HOUSTON. TEXAS
Cood value: that ate styled
the way young men prefer
their clothes and many of
these Suits are excellent
weights for Spring wear.
#30 t)a/ues #22.75
#33 M/ties #27.75
#37.30 M/ues #29.73
#40.00 ua/ues #33.73
#42.30 fa/ues #33.73
#43 t)a/aes #37.75
#47.30 va/aes #39.73
#50.00 ua/ues . #4/.75
#55.00 vafuea #46.75
#60.00 t)a/ue5 #50.75
WAere You CasA Your CAec^s
Read 77te /Vousfon CAromc/e for R/ceNetiR
The Chronicle has TWO reportorial
\-J! representatives at Rice, ana is pre-
pared to handle aii news stones
available. Athletic contests will be
written up in full.
.See (he C%ron%c/e Carrier, Room We.yf HaM
Monster Clearance of
Suits an J
Continuous streams of pru-
dent buyers are daily availing
themselves of the remarkable
Included in the clearance is
every Suit and Overcoat in our
stock, absolutely without re-
serve, featuring such well-known
High Art Clothes
Made by Strouss & Brothers, !nc.
an J Co#egtan C/ofAes
And Many Other Dependable
M)fe Me Pr/ce RetfucMona
&e %eM Ma/uM Tomorrow
71ras' MoJg/ Bar&er 5Aop
M. TtRAS. Proprietor
Those Classy College Hair Cuts
Open SMcMy 5anHary
914 Texas Ave.. Opp. Rice Hotet
Fannin and Eag!e Sts.
P/tone /Vatf/et/ 44
A REAL rNVEST-
When you buy a
Diamond from this
Arm you do not
spend money — but
rather you make an
dividends in pleas-
ure as well as dol-
lars and cents.
Let us show yon
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The Thresher (Houston, Tex.), Vol. 5, No. 11, Ed. 1 Thursday, January 15, 1920, newspaper, January 15, 1920; Houston, Texas. (texashistory.unt.edu/ark:/67531/metapth229844/m1/4/: accessed September 26, 2018), University of North Texas Libraries, The Portal to Texas History, texashistory.unt.edu; crediting Rice University Woodson Research Center.