Dallas Voice (Dallas, Tex.), Vol. 19, No. 41, Ed. 1 Friday, February 7, 2003 Page: 43 of 72

                                
By Gilbert Garcia
Pop Music Critic
If a guy can cross over from
gay porn to straight porn, why
couldn't he cross over to music
as well? That must be what the
conversation went like the day
that porn legend Jeff Stryker
was tapped to become a coun-
try singer. As improbable as it
might seem, the Lesbian &
Gay Country Music
Association's Web site
(lgcma.com) has been promis-
ing just that in the very near
future. Though an album is not
yet complete, several tracks
penned by country songwriter
Jimmy-Joe have begun making
their way out, providing quite
a buzz along the way.
Truth be told, if any porn
star could pull this sort of
thing off, it would be Stryker.
One of the few- real megastars
of XXX, Stryker is also one of
the few with a real handle on
his own image and career. As
owner of his own production
and marketing companies, Stryker made him-
self a good living as an actor, and an even bet-
ter living selling his own brand of greeting
cards, underwear and his ubiquitous custom-
molded dildo. As anyone with a mind for mar-
keting may have noticed, queer and country
go together quite well these days, much to the
chagrin of the Bible belt. Putting arguably the
most watched gay actor in the world onstage
to sing at honky-tonks is, to borrow an expres-
sion, an idea so crazy it just might work.
Without a doubt, the best track of this small
collection so far is the hilariously ribald "Pop
You in the Pooper" (one can only imagine
what the line dance for that one will look like).
Running a close second is the equally raunchy,
though slightly more subtle, "What a Man Has
To Do." Fans will no
doubt be surprised to
hear that a sweet
Randy Travis-like war-
ble has replaced
Stryker's usual gruff,
Eastern accent. The
songwriting on these
tracks is passable,
though not great. One
gets the idea that song-
writing isn't so much
the point here as fun,
though. Thankfully,
fun is the one thing
these songs don't lack.
The Ethel Merman Disco Album
Fynswortli Alley
Be very afraid — The Ethel Merman Disco
Album is back. Originally recorded in 1979, the
release of Merman's first (and last) disco
With "Pop You in the Pooper," Jeff Stryker
croons the best C&W song about anal sex ever.
But are there any other ones out there?
album coincided quite neatly with the spectac-
ular implosion of the disco craze. As a result,
the record quickly went out of print, making it
an almost immediate cult classic. Nothing this
amazingly weird could stay out of the public
eye forever, though. The album has recently
been dug up by Broadway publishers
Fynsworth Alley, who have now released it on
CD for the first time. Predictably enough, the
new disc represents both the best and worst in
camp.
Merman reportedly refused to sing along to
the music when recording this album, prefer-
ring to sing unaccompanied, then letting the
producers take care of the instrumental tracks
separately. If that's the case, then she can hard-
ly be blamed for what is undoubtedly the
worst part of this
record. The music is
not only bad, it's
almost unbearably so,
from its insipid party
slogan singing chorus
to its so pre-pro-
grammed it hurts
arrangements. Setting
songs like "There's No
Business Like Show
Business" to disco
beats may have been
serious, or it may have
been a joke. But as this
album drags on with
one Merman classic
after another, it's a joke that gets less and less
funny. Listening to the songs on this album,
one can clearly see just why disco died. After
hearing the entire thing, some may wish it had
died just a little sooner. ▼
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DAUAS VOICE
FEBRUARY 7, 2003
43