The Collegian (Brownwood, Tex.), Vol. 29, No. 13, Ed. 1, Saturday, December 15, 1934 Page: 2 of 4
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THt DANISH. 1AKIR COLLEGIAN
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THE DANIEL BAKER COLLEGIAN
Entered at Post Office of Brownwood Tex. as second class matter
GRADY LEACH Editor
lim T.T T TO (
vv i. cjuuio Business Manager
MORRIS RODGERS Associate Editor
TRAVIS FOSTER Associate Editor
Sara Collins Collegiate Digest Correspondent
Elizabeth Blalock Society Editor
Juanita Thomason Exchange Editor
Mr. Zany Columnist
Mary Holmes Circulation Manager
Helen Post Wright Faculty Advisor
SLANTS AT THE
FACULTY
r . . rM-"SS"""L.-iT
'ZLW . J H.. rrrrrrrr V t t
'&&
NUT TROUHLE AND MONKEY BUSINESS
It seem that something should be clone about the numerous
fatal automobile accidents that are taking place on every corner
every day. But instead of doing anything about it the auto fac-
tories are making improvements daily in their machines and God's
machines are doing tilings daily that are nuttier and nuttier.
Yes tomorrow cars will be faster more powerful more com-
fortable and with improved brakes; but what good the brakes
when the present day comfort radios the drivers to sleep before
they ever become conscious that their vehicle comes equipped
with brakes.
From the standpoint of public safety we still need an im-
provement the manufacturers cannot provide. That is the elimi-
nation of the nut behind the wheel!
Legislature will have to supply that and from previous sad
experience there is little hope it will set up any machinery for
nut-elimination because you see legislators are the nuttiest
nuts of all.
NERTS to the present day mode of law-making and law-
enforcement. PLEASE breathe a prayer daily that you will never bring
misfortune on yourself and others by running down a little child
God grant that such a misfortune will never fall upon one of us.
MEN WANTED!
A rortnt (rnunnimnnt aiittrmr vtnnhiri flint. Rrirc P 11 4-l
machinery in the country is more than 10 years old; 3000000
homes need modern lighting ; more than 10000000 homes need a
tub or shower; America needs 400000 new homes every year;
56r; of city homes have no central heating and every third house
that you pass needs painting and redecorating both on the outside
and the inside.
Society is demanding original ideas inventions anything that
cuts down labor and yet people are forever howling that there is
no new things to do. Every thing is NEW. There is no field that
has not changed in the past decade even religion is on the brink
of revision. And yet we sit around and howl that machinery has
taken the place of labor put man idle ; a greater fallacy never ex-
istedmore fields are in their infacy than at any other time since
The Beginning.
Pick out the field that you wish to follow and start digging.
Cull out the inferior seeds and plant only the fertile. The crop
that you will rean will be well worth your time.
it rne iemaio luea ot cnua-oearing continues much longer
there will come. a time not far off when there will be more jobs
than men and machinery can handle that is intelligent men cap-
able of operating modern equipment.
NOW ! is the time to wield the hoe ; pick out the mature stalks
and chop the weeds and the stunted plants. One fruit bearing
plant is enough for there are so many others that have planted
good seeds that you will have to devote your entire time to the
one or you will lose your franchise on the whole.
JUST SNOOPING
AROUND
We wonder what science assistant
is being called Mr. Ward and why?
Welma Green as well as everybody
else is convinced that she's been given
the run-a-round by Beans Morris.
Somebody please tell me If he is tak-
ing it like she is.
Mary Ann Beck doenn't think she
did so well at the banquet. She should
have though because she has those
taking ways.
Morris Rogers Is using his position
ror sometning besides giving poor fish
trouble. He is evidently helping the
harressed Christmas shoppers find out
what the girl or boy friends want for
Christmas. Call it an English assign-
ment if you want to.
Wilma Pratt don't worry so about
that Christmas present. It'll all come
out in the wash.
Those love birds still hover over
Tissie and Pete. Here's hoping they
still thrive.
Reckon J. Lee can't find anything
to get mad and quit Agnes about. It's
aimosi (jnnstmas about that time.
Will Miss Walker find that Christ-
mas tree loaded down? Perhaps Santa
Claus will send It clear from Arkan-
sas. We hope so cause we klnda like
bar.
Those holiday decorations will real-
ly be Btrunar around the dorm narlnr
Saturday night. Welma Green Sally
Bess Evans and Jane MoWJlllaras are
campused and will entertain in ttaej
parlor. Please take notice Mr. Leach
Jessie James and we would love to
know who will court the popular Wel-
ma. What's wrong? It has been reported
that Mary Ann Beck and Sara Collins
have sworn to forget their Mr. X's.
They are going to get a canary a cat
and some goldfish and settle down to
bo old maid teachers so they say.
Brand New News has come to light
recently. Maurino Charnqulst seems
to have forgotten all about Menard
and can see only Red now. What about
ii Aiaurine?
Wonder why Reaves Hickman isn't
giving the elrls a break this venr.
Perhaps ho will now that football Is
over uont give up girls.
Say what's this we hear about
Peggy Charnquist and her new crush4
She has been seen at the basketball
games with her eyes centered on one
of the forwards one Jake McCully
from Blanket Isn't it Peggy?
THESE QUALITNES PREFERRED
IN IDEAL GIRL OF DAN-
IEL BAKER CAMPUS
Cross; brown
Eyes Blue Lucy
Hetty Fay Todd.
Ears Sara Collins.
Nose Peggy Charnqulst.
Lips Gladys Oxford.
Teeth Ophelia Toole.
Hair Nell Guthrie.
Personality Bee Hickman
Figure Sarah McCreary.
Hands Mary Hart.
Feet Lois Lamb.
Silence Is the college yell of the!
scoooi or experience.
Mrt. "Tricky" Ward
Question: Where were you born?
Answer: Born in Texas.
Q: What schools have you attend-
ed? A: Sam Houston State Teachers
College. Hnntsvllle. Texas: Columbia
University New York City; Universi
ty oi uaiuornra Bcrxciey; university
of Mlrhlcrnn. Ann Ai-hnr.
Q: Did you ever fail a course in
scnooi7
A: No.
Q: What positions or occupations
have you held to date?
A! Hlirh Srhnnl Prlnrlnnl. tnnrher
of Mnth untl Sclenco In Hieh School.
assistant in Biology State Teachers
College head of Science department
Junior College.
Q: What church preferred?
A: Methodist.
Q: What continent's have you visit-
ed? Which do you like best?
A: None.
Q: Who Is your favorite author?
A: "The Sport Page" author.
Q: Did you ever write stories es
says novels or poetry?
A: Yes but the publishers were
very unkind to them.
Q: What are your favorite mnun-
zines ?
A: National G"oirranhlc. Scientific
Monthly Journal of Chemical Educa
tion.
Q: What kind of stories do you like
best?
A: Those I can't see through.
Q: Do you play any musical in.stiu-
ments ?
A : Yes I once played a Jew's hat p.
Q: What hobby do you follow?
A: Painting- walls and ceilings of
laboratories.
Q: What is your most fixed habit?
A : Eating.
Q: What is your favorite food cuke
anil dessert?
A: Chicken pie Devil food (cake.)
Q: What nrc your favorite colors?
A: Blue and white.
Q: What is your favorite powder?
A: Natural- -It doesn't show diit.
Q: What Is your favorite perfume?
A: Not H2S.
Q: What dress material do you pre-
fer? A: Gingham.
Q: Do you like to ride in airplanes?
A: Yes you get there quicker.
Q: Do you diive a car? Ever ride
a bicycle? Ever skate?
A: Yes yes yes.
Q: Do you like the radio?
A: Yes durine; the football season.
Q: What comedians of the air and
pictures do you like best?
A: Amos 'n Andy.
Q: Do you attend the movies?
A: Yes when thev don't enst morn
than a dime.
Q: What actor or actress preferred?
A: Mary Plckford.
Q: Do you object to dancing? mix-
ed bathing? bridge playing?
A: No No No.
Did you ever go hunting?
Yes.
Do you ride horseback ?
Yes.
Do you like to fish ? What is the
latgest one you ever caught?
A: Yes you wouldn't believe it.
Q: Your nearest escape fiom death?
A: Skating on ice -went throuirh.
Q: The most cxcltlnc incident that
ever happened to you?
a: All football games.
Q: What was your youthful ambi
tion?
A: To be an old-maid school teach
er.
Q: What is your philosophy of life?
A: To accomplish the most with the
least work.
Q: What do you like better than
anything else in the world?
A: Strawberry shortcake with nlon-
ty of whipped cream.
Q: What is your ultimate goal in
life?
A: To get rich teaching.
Q: Are you superstltuous?
A: No but I do not like black cats.
Q: Will Roosevelt bring about re
lief?
A: Not if it is left to Roosevelt
alone.
Q: What was the most embarrass.
lng moment of your life?
A: Answer to No. 28.
Q: Do you llko pets?
A: Very few.
Q: Should mule students take un
home economics?
A: Yes somebody must see to th
family table.
Q: Do you approve of campus ro-
mances? A: No they are not everlasting.
Q: What do you think of women
smoking?
A: Shows lack of knowledge.
Q: Who do you think the srreiitnst
American is or was (man or woman) ?
A: Their names are not roeortinri in
history.
1
. l i I
THIS WEEK AT
THE LYRIC
Saturday Sunday Dae. 15 16 A
Girl of the Llmberlost." An outstand-
ing picture in the silent days "A Girl
of the Llmberlost" produced as a talk-
ing plctmo by Monogram has been
acclaimed as one of the most faithful
selects versions of a popular novel
ever pioduccd. All the flavor of the
Poiter original has been preserved in
the screen vcislon of Gene Stiatton-
l'oitei's best seller. Louise Dresser
Ralph Morgan Marian Marsh and H.
P. Walthall play the leading parts in
this picture for the whole family.
Monday Tuesday Dec. 17 18
"What Every Woman Knows." At last
Helen Hayes has realized her desire
fo piny her favorite part on the screen
the leading part in Sir James Barrie's
famous drama "What Every Woman
Knows." That play was her greatest
on the stage. Three years ago Miss
Hayes made her llr.st picture and re-
ceived the Academy award for It but
she lcfuscd to make pictures unless
she would be allowed to play this
part flic recreates the beloved role
THE NUT CRACKER
By Who Cares
Suspicious
a. oi.r tnni.i went to have her pic
ture taken and the photographer no-
iin.il her tvlnir it niece of clothes line
around the bottom of her skirt.
"What's the Idea of that 7" he asK-
cd "I can't take n picture that way."
"You can't fool me young man"
she replied "1 know you sec me up-
side down in that camera."
What's the trouble between Tlssle
and Roach? Have they quarreled?
No the patch came off their old
one. 3
WJMM
Q:
A:
Q:
A:
Q:
..i. vVft
Xxsaisrf
Brian Ahcrnc and Madge Evani
in "What Every Woman Knows"
of Maggie Wylle who entered into n
.strange maniage contract and then
used all of her womanly wiles to hold
her husband. Brian Aheme Madge
Kvans and Lucille Watson are also in
the cast of this Metro-Goldwyn-Muyer
triumph.
Wednesday Thursday Dec. 19 20
"Outcast Lady." A story of brilliance.
model ii highly intelligent tiontili- of
men and women who live .sophisticat-
ed colorful lives "Outcast Lady" is
heralded as the .smartest dramatic at-
traction of the year. With Herbert
Marshall as the leading man M. G.
M. have given the scieen a new type
of romantic learn. The treat 'urn rough
hot-cha- lovers will have to give the
When you are far away dear
T promise to be true;
Whenever 1 kiss another man
I'll always think of you.
Louise Smith at ball game: Why
does that man behind the hitter wear
such a big bib?
Juke Mc: That's to keep the catch-
er's shirt from getting mussed up
when the ball knocks his teeth out.
1 Fa' hoi How are you getting along
t s hool my liny'.'
P...') 'triumphantly): Awfully well
1. 1 'l Me teieher said only yesterday
th.it If all the boys were like me she
I'U! shut school tomorrow.
A vagrant when taken to the police
:.tatl"ii was told to stiip and take a
iK'lll
"V'lip!. go in the water?" he asked.
' i y.'M need It. How long has It
r ynu h'id a bath?"
'Veil I never was arrested before."
.'1 itl instructor writes "LXXX" on
fi bi axl and asks a good looking
i'l in the front low to tell him what
i .'.nf.
' it means love and kisses" she rc-
. I I.
"r wish" rompluined the preacher
'"I i t I I'ordil make my flock take
note of an interest In Heaven. None
jf them srein to want to go."
"Tell them that children under six-
teen are not permitted" suggested the
helpful friend.
New York stAt k...u .. m
the bum's rush yet but they S
passed a special taw wqulriJ'S
teachers In the ti .i.rmu
an oath of allegiance touSToiSf'
tlon. No rimihf n. -IT.. cnUtu.
for the political science tiiEfS
many of whom hnn.i.. . :"
so that the Constitution ?j J
ty
"What's all this?" asked Prof. Mc-
i -.
Cleliand. 3
uiose are my Aiae west prob-
lems" explained Foster.
"Mae West?"
"Yeah 1 done em wrong."
mm
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r?Vtt(f ' t'S kjBBBB VjJHL J
l1wfe "l P A .BBBBBBBaPf 1
I hAl'Wt
5v f A&
ft- r J'
"Yes." said the candidate "I'm go-
ing among the farmers today to a
p.inrpkin show or jackass show or
something of that sort. Not that I
cate for pumpkins or jackasses but I
want to show the people that I am
one of them."
Mrs. Ward in Zoo .'5: Now Morris
yo 1 may describe the octopus."
Morris Rodges: Well. I'm not ex-
ac"ly sure about it but the name
v)n is to mc like it means an eight
siu.'d eat.
'.
x- i
.
Vfit K" '
l T
Elizabeth Allan
.0! Hole I
nonsense
ground before the suave teridei yet
lorceful romnnce of these two mild-
er ns. Klizabeth Allan the Knglish
nctrewt plays the third part of the tj.
angle. The cast also includes Hugh
Williams Mis. Patrick Campbell and
Robert Lorraine. It was directed by
Robert 2. Leonard.
PERSONALS
The favorite bit of reminlscenm for
a Minnesota professor concerned his
carry uays when be once ended a
lecture by asking for questions from
the students. There was no resnonse.
so he waited growing more and more
nervous. Finally he offered a clo-aret
to the first one asking an intelligent
question. Another loner silence. Fin.
ally a boy's hand went up:
"What kind of a curaret?" he ask
ed.
1
The greatest secret of success is to
I do and to do without.
Frank Cokor is In Ualllngei where
he was culled to the death lied of his
father.
Irby Cleaton arrived fiom Odcsa
to spsnd a week with friends hero.
W. A. Williams nnd Wllmn iw.
visnco. in uioas pjulnn Tuesday.
Elizabeth Blulock pent Tuesday in
Fort Worth shopping.
James and Seaborn Collins spent the
week end hero with fi lends.
Kathleen Ileatherly June MacWil-
Hams and Grady Leach visited friends
In Coleman Sunday.
Dr. Davis has been absent fiom the
campus almost all week. He was in
Fort Worth on business Thursday
At California by the way the girls
have organized a Women's Auxiliary
to the football team. Tho latest re-
port from their executive states that
the girls have declared a bnn n n
amours until the team wins a con-
wrence game ny at least soven points.
One never learns any tiling about
per nle by going in the fiont door; go
th r.iiph the back door.
With all due apologies to the flor-
ists. It would be better to "say it with
bi akes." aid save the flowers.
Folks demanding the most service
are usually the slowest pay.
Ice Is the onlv thim i -....
wi...t it iu .......'"'! """ '" "'"W
k " -im:neii up in )o
Wilma Piatt was heatd to say the
other day: "I am so dumb that life is
ual ly interesting. Why. Icurn
'' i-i.iiiijK new every day."
"Here's mud In ye eye" said tho
plalrlt. "H il fP" " Ul 0tatoe
The "lilnu'.riui.n ...i.i.
f . ' " "" wmen puns up to
M- ghten enemies has a few bi others
nd sisters on the campus -they are
"t least blow-hards. y
Kudlo is now used to ge and fur-
nlM power to- cars trains. plnne8
Mi ps power plants to lead blind men
to make n niii.i . . .
in it. nrr . ms nr l hUH Wed
si 1 aZ t.u""ke a wh'll"rrow
.straddle a mud hole.
Television ii. 111 . ..
Ijie abser.ee of t-hnoS SS:
;r:.i'LtathuX
should 1 ;"cu wey inin8
MAJESTIC
BARBER: SHOP
COURTEOUS SERVICE
Reavis & Reynolds
ioi$.
1004 AUSTIN AVENUE
SELLERS
ALWAYS FOR
DANIEL BAKER
Yours for Service
Sellers' Barber Shop
1417 Austin Ave.
ALL KINDS OP SHOE REPAIRING
Chas. L. Faulkinberry
"THE SHOE MAN"
906 Center Avenue
D. D. McINROE & CO.
REALTORS INSURANCE
LOANS
Telephone 173
For That
NEW SUIT
or
TOPCOAT
We Can Give
YOU
Harris Tweed
Shelton
and Many Other
Desirable Fabrics
All Made to
Measure
and a
Guaranteed
Fit
Try Us for Your
Next Suit
AZTEC
DRYdEANERS
1008 Austin Ave.
Phone 361
QUINCY
The Shine King!
SHOES DYED ALL COLORS
DYER AND SHINE FOR
HILL BILLIES
at Majestic Barber
Shop
fiBLV
DR. R. A. ELLIS
Optometrist
For Appointment Call 169
Get Your COFFEE and HOT CHOCOLATE
HERE 5c per Cup
PALACE DRUG STORE
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The Collegian (Brownwood, Tex.), Vol. 29, No. 13, Ed. 1, Saturday, December 15, 1934, newspaper, December 15, 1934; Brownwood, Texas. (https://texashistory.unt.edu/ark:/67531/metapth100076/m1/2/: accessed April 26, 2024), University of North Texas Libraries, The Portal to Texas History, https://texashistory.unt.edu; crediting Howard Payne University Library.