South Texas Catholic (Corpus Christi, Tex.), Vol. 30, No. 43, Ed. 1 Friday, December 11, 1987 Page: 5 of 16
This newspaper is part of the collection entitled: Texas Gulf Coast Register/South Texas Catholic and was provided to The Portal to Texas History by the UNT Libraries.
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December 11, 1987—5
%_
Christian Family
By Dolores Curran
The assignment was, "If I could
change one thing about Christmas, it
would be...” The group consisted of
33 families, some with small children,
some with teens. We asked each family
to collect its member’s answers and
put an age on each respondent.
Here’s what we heard.
Twenty-one adults (no children)
said, “A shorter season.” Twenty
said, "Spend less money.” Nineteen
said, "Less commercialism.”
Sixteen, all children, said, “Getting
what I ask for.” Eighteen, both
children and parents, said, “A greater
religious emphasis.” Nine said, “Not
have house guests.”
Others that were mentioned more
than five times were: "Not send
Christmas cards;” “Not have to buy
presents;” “Not so many parties and
programs;” “Get along better in the
family;” “Stay home for Christmas;”
“Kids get too hyped up;” “More
quiet time for myself;” and “Relax
and enjoy the holiday more.”
Some that were mentioned only
once were, “No oyster stew;" "Not
have grownups drink so much;” “Not
go to Midnight Mass;” “No fruit
cake;” and “Get to see Santa Claus.”
The next chore we assigned families
was to take the change each member
desired and come up with suggestions
for dealing with them. This was a real
struggle because expectations came in-
to play. If Dad said, “Spend less
money, ” and children said, “More
gifts,” they had to negotiate how they
could please both.
It is an interesting exercise for
families, one I suggest you consider.
The discussion centered around expec-
tations and definitions of what a good
Christmas should be. When each
member of the family has a different
definition, some are bound to face
disappointment and/or frustrations.
Since we come from different
families we bring different expecta-
tions of Christmas into marriage. One
wife came from a family where
Christmas meant spending time with
aunts, uncles, cousins and grand-
parents. Her husband came from one
where Christmas meant spending
quiet time together with spouse and
children.
Each was disappointed with the holi-
day season until they negotiated and
agreed to spend two full days with
relatives and that was all. It seems like
a simple solution but prior to it, they
tried to snatch visits during a two week
period and never had a quiet day at
home.
Another family struggled with the
desires of their back home college kids
who wanted only to crash after exams
and travel and the other members who
wanted to take part in family and com-
munity festivities. They came up with
accepting no invitations requiring full
family attendance the first three days
of the students’ return. In exchange,
the students agreed to participate with
grace (and without reluctance) after
three days.
Many families agreed to put a spen-
ding limit on gifts to each other or to
ask relatives if they could agree on a
mutual spending limit in an attempt to
cut back on Christmas expenses. One
family made a decision against charg-
ing anything because they tended to
"go crazy with credit cards at
Christmas,” and paid for it by living
frugally for months.
We do have more control over
Christmas than we exercise. We don’t
have to repeat every tradition if it
causes stress and tension that leads to
short tempers, outbursts, hyperactive
children, and marital discord. We can
adopt new traditions of simplicity, of
quiet, and of reconciliation.
Control, however, demands atten-
tion before the season gets underway.
It means a family conference and
negotiation. It means collaborating
until the family comes up with solu-
tions most satisfactory to all. It does
not mean everyone will be fully
satisfied but that everyone will be less
dissatisfied, Not bad, that.
ing. By taking advantage of the learn-
ing one can receive by “sitting at the
feet of the Master” and responding to
the individual call to go out and pro-
claim the Good News, we too become
the Apostles of today.
In the Diocese of Corpus Christi,
through the work of the Pastoral In-
stitute, lay persons have an excellent
chance to receive the knowledge and
wisdom Jesus left us.
Guest Column
Thus the fear that comes from not
knowing enough about your faith to go
out and teach is a fear that can only
prevent you from your Gospel call,
and it is a fear that the Church is at-
tempting to help you dispel through
such programs.
The point is that the world has
changed, again no longer is it
necessary for a minister to have a
degree in theology and be ordained or
vowed to be an effective minister.
A lay minister in the parish, school
or even workplace can reach people
that a priest or Sister may never see.
Isn’t that what “proclaiming to the
ends of the world” is all about?
I encourage and challenge you, my
brothers and sisters in Christ. Do not
allow useless fear and anxiety to pre-
vent you from carrying out your voca-
tion, your calling. If you are married,
if you are single, if you do not feel you
are called to the priesthood or religious
life, know that you are still a vital and
“just-as-important” part to the
Church’s future.
We must truly become the Good
Seed and yield. Thus, our vocations
crisis will be over, not because the
seminaries, convents, and monasteries
are full of new recruits, but because
the laborers have been sent out into
the fields and are bringing in a rich
harvest.
Talks with Parents
If I could
change
Lay ministry is vital to growth of Catholic Church
By David L. Bieniek
Youth Ministry Office
When Jesus first called his Apostles,
they came from His loyal followers.
They were by our standards
uneducated; most were fishermen.
The only formal education these men
had was sitting at the feet of the
Master, listening. And from there they
were commanded to go out and live,
preach and proclaim the Good News.
Today the Church faces what some
call a “vocations crisis.” It is the opi-
nion of this writer that what the
Church is actually facing is not a crisis
but a chance for natural growth. The
vocations are out there, but they do
not look the same as they did years
ago.
Those looking for vocations have to
learn to look for a different type. Lay
ministry is a vocation as clearly as the
priesthood or the religious life and it is
the vital link the Church needs in this
all-too secular world.
What is “lay ministry?” Some look
at it as a substitute for the priesthood
or religious life; a ministry performed
by those who “should have been”
priests, Sisters or Brothers. However,
documents from Vatican II and other
sources have supported lay ministry as
a separate but equally important voca-
tion in the Priesthood of Jesus Christ
and His Mystical Body, the Church.
Lay ministers can be young or old,
male or female, single or married. In
fact, all members of the Church who
are not serving as a priest or living in a
religious order are called to be lay
ministers, in one form or the other,
through the gift we received at our
baptism in the fellowship of the Holy
Spirit.
Lay ministry can be so much more
than just being a Christian in daily liv-
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Freeman, Robert E. South Texas Catholic (Corpus Christi, Tex.), Vol. 30, No. 43, Ed. 1 Friday, December 11, 1987, newspaper, December 11, 1987; Corpus Christi, Texas. (https://texashistory.unt.edu/ark:/67531/metapth840840/m1/5/?q=%22%22~1: accessed July 17, 2024), University of North Texas Libraries, The Portal to Texas History, https://texashistory.unt.edu; .